Hiya Karate Tits

Christ Jebus on lollerskates.
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What does the rest of the world call this technique, hiya karate tits? This is made of God and Win. There needs to be an Olympic beer can tit smashing event. She would certainly get a gold medal, since there seems to be few competitors with massive jugs like hers.

Can you imagine if she hit you with one of those? She'd either knock you out or kill ya all kinds of dead.

I wonder if they bruise easily, like a watermelon or cantalopes do? The second thing that comes to mind is, are they actually real, is this some kind of stunt that involves prosthetic breasts? I think those knockers need to be inspected to ensure there is no trickery involved.

Busty Heart has some notoriety for her talent so far, having her own website, appearances on various shows including that clip from "America's Got Talent".

Angry Clown will have a follow up report on the identity and background of this woman, and the authenticity of her talents.

In the meantime, you can see m0ar tit smashing fun at the following links:

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Weirdest Shit Evar

Looking for that perfect gift? Meet Facebank from Banpresto. A piggy bank with a twist.

I swear the Japanese make some of the weirdest shit in the universe.

The Facebank is hungry and LOVES to eat your coins! Using sensors embedded in the eyes, the Facebank knows that you’re about to give it a delicious coin and starts to chew. Just leave it in his mouth, and he’ll chew it up and swallow it!

I'd hate to get my finger caught in there... or my penis. O_O YIPES OmzzSgHlFknSH#&;*!!!!!!


You can find out whether or not I'd actually do that at the following links:

Static Krapsody - the place to find out of the ordinary humor the Land of Arse USA	http://www.krapsody.com
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Lick The Big Bone

 

You can thank Thomas Jefferson, the third President of the United States (1801–1809), and the principal author of the Declaration of Independence (1776), for starting what would become the largest collection of North American Mammoth fossil bones (in scientific speak that means, old massive pricks.) History and science come together in this fascinating story of a woodland salt lick and how the fossilized big bones found there influenced the beginnings of paleontological pornography in America.

Located on Beaver Road and between the communities of Beaverlick and Rabbit Snatch, Northern Kentucky's Big Bone Lick saline springs have nurtured man and animal for centuries, and the big bones of extinct mastodons, bison and other creatures are buried deep in there to prove it.

The park features several nature trails, including the Outdoor Museum of Big Bonin' with Discovery Trail (I'll let you decide what that means), complete with spurting springs -  and everyone knows that Kentuckians love salty springs erupting from Big Bones, just as much as Georgians do. Ever seen Deliverance?

We're all Georgians..well, not really. But we do have Big Bones.



Biology Professor emeritus Eyema Hedonist, illuminates a time when the concept of extinction of the Big Bone was considered outrageous, if not downright blasphemous, since it contradicted the biblical doctrine of a perfect, unchanging Big Bone creation. The Big Bone Theory, if you will, was met with much criticism.
 
Early 18th-century Big Bone naturalists believed the Big Bones were remnants of some, get this: rare type of elephant dong, possibly even Asian elephant dongs that had somehow wandered into American forests.. let's just see how many hits those underlined search words get on Google. God knows I've had plenty for whale penis.

Thomas Jefferson used the Mammoth bones to refute the European idea that the New World environment was inferior and unable to grow large animals. No doubt, this theory was unfounded.

 

These elephants got Big Bones.

Today Big Bone lies mostly in obscurity, much like this blogger's articles. However, with the advent of Viagra and Cialis, Big Bone may rise again. Long live Big Bone! The End.

It's amazing what you can find on the 'interweb', said Jumbone Licker, If I were to surf the interweb more often, I'd totally do it nekkid!










You can find out more about this degenerate, obscure blog-tard and his mammoth Big Bone at the following links:

Static Krapsody - the place to find out of the ordinary humor the Land of Arse USA	http://www.krapsody.com
funny pics & videos, humor, comedy, satire
Visit MyBlogLog and get a signature like this!

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Things to know part 1

Yes we can

"If only I knew then what I know now"

I've learned a lot in my 26 years on this earth like sponges are smarter then starfish and if its wet then it isn't a fart, yes I've learned a lot.

Its about time that I shared my amazing 26 year olds wisdom with the world in an attempt to make living in it just a little bit easier because I'm super nice and awesome and stuff and...junk.

There are some things in life that you don't get told about and just have to learn yourself and there are other things that shouldn't be talked about even if it would help out because they're classed as being "taboo", well fuck that!

Heres everything you should of been told but weren't because your parents were pussy's!

Santa is not real, none of those things are real, no easter bunny no tooth fairy, no nuttun so get the fuck over it!

The "bible" is really just a load of crap, if you ever read it you would find out that it is more unbelievable then the "Harry Potter" novels, which brings me to my next point. People are gullible, you can scam anything out of them IF you are smart enough!

Don't trust anyone... EVER if you do you will be disappointed but especially don't trust priests or help a priest shove a candle up his ass if he asks, if he doesn't then its ok.

Never say yes to a favor before you know what it is, you could be shoveling shit for a week for all you know.

You can't chose your family but you can divorce them!

If life gives you lemons say "fuck the lemons" !

Never ever follow threw on a fart, just don't do it.

The final and most important lesson I've learned is that people die and there is nothing you can do about it so learn to deal because one day you and everyone you know will die so make the most of what you have now and never forget that the grass is never greener on the other side its just been fertilized with bullshit.

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The fat flash

The following series of events written in this post is based on a true story and readers discretion is advised...

yeah ok whatever, fucken weirdo!

My plan for world domination was put into action today, yes thats right WORLD DOMINATION (ambiance). It might not seem like there are a lot of things one can do outside of the netz when trying to TAKE OVER THE WORLD (more ambiance) but! I have discovered that if you want to get your point across then sometimes you have to force it.

WORLD DOMINATION. (eh blah)

Whilst shopping for a new mobile phone today I noticed a large sum of computers hooked up to the netz for the cumstainers (customers) to look at porn or the best deals online or some crap.

As one does while being around a large sum of computers and with the urge to TAKE OVER THE WORLD I made the crazy decision to turn all the home pages from the boring crappy phone company's own site to Angry Clown!

This worked well! With all off the computers being changed (for the better) in the mobile phone store I decided to take the show on the road, stopping in and changing the home pages of at least 20 other stores in the center, I had never felt happier until...

...Security was called and with a woosh and a blangodo splat? I was out off there like a really really fast fat man with roles of lard and hair flopping out of every uncovered part of my body, I was the fat flash I tells ya!

After my amazing and brave escape from the clutches of EVILLLL... I went back! As you do after doing crime, and found a group of people at almost all the computers laughing while the retail assistants ran around looking worried turning off all the computers as they went.

This was truly my greatest moment and have more planned now I have a taste for danger, my plan to TAKE OVER THE WORLD is almost complete, all I need is access to everyones computer and BLAMMO- WORLD DOMINATION! I also cant wait to piss more people off!

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Skinny dipping ya pussy

I keep hearing that there are "many ways to skin a cat" yet I have never heard of the actual ways of skinning a cat, ok I know of one way, the old knife in the gut and and slice and dice baby but I'm sure there are more ways...I've been told!

This cat would look better without skin

How did this saying come to be? Did someone need to skin a cat but had no idea how to or did someone sit down one day and make a list of all the ways to skin a cat and then think "wow there is a lot of ways to skin a cat"?

No matter now, whats done is done and we have a crap saying for it, and still no idea just how many ways there are to skin a pussy.

Well guess what? I've decided to look into it and I've come up with some of the best ways to remove that pesky skin from your feline friend, it can get annoying having all that skin on your pussy not to mention the hair...no one likes a hairy pussy!

Half way there

There are about 246 ways to skin a cat that I've found threw my research and I've chosen 5 of the best to share with you!

1. The tumble dryer is not just used for clothes anymore, place a pussy and a few hundred razor blades in it and place on high, BLAMMO one skinned cat!

2. The get someone else to do it. Leave your pussy outside a Chinese food shop, wait an hour then go back, done! You might have to pay to get your skinless pussy back but its worth it!

3. The meat ants nest, find a nest place the cat on top and in a couple of minutes its skinless, like magic!

4. Freeze it off, soak your pussy in water then freeze it, when frozen use a hammer and chisel to chip away at the skin.

5. Chew it off! Its messy and not very tasty but there is nothing like sticking your face in a pussy and having a chew also it can be an awesome bonding tool for you and your pet, I know I would never forget it and I'm sure your pussy wont either!

So there ya have it folks, some of the best ways to skin a cat, did I mention to make sure your pussy has kicked the bucket first? No well I have now so go have fun ya little scamps and remember to stay away from drugs ya little shits, haha bye.

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Angry Clown day

Dec 25 is the first annual Angry Clown day, I've decided so join in on the celebrations.

The date is no coincidence, its especially been chosen for the folks that don't like celebrating Xmas and for those that don't want to miss out on the fun of Xmas without doing all the Xmas stuff.

The best thing about this day is that you don't have to do a damn thing that you don't want to do! No visiting family and friends, no buying presents for the kids and no Santa!

AC day is all about you, thats right its about what you want to do and fuck everyone else so tell you friends and family, wife and/or husband and kids to go fuck themselves with a long blunt stick because its Angry Clown day you don't give a shit!

All day on the 25th I will be posting live from party central, keeping all you Angry Clown wannabes up to date with what the fuck is going on...its gunna be crap!

Remember the true meaning of AC day -

'Humanity has reached a point in history where it is ok to say fuck off'

and we will never forget it!

Help celebrate AC day and show your support by placing this small badge on your blog or website.

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