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Unmotivated Bum Syndrome

Tuesday, September 23, 2008

A classic case of unmotivated bum syndrome.

Motivation sucks not just the word because its hard to spell but the whole damn concept is hard but maybe thats because I'm unmotivated which for a wannabe humor writer makes me feel like a bum, which is another name for a humor blogger oohhh I went there.

My motivation problem or lack of motivation problem hit me around the time that people started reading this blog and expecting cleverness and witty remarks on my behalf and it continued until I asked another author (Static) what I can do about my problem and he said that I have "a classic case of comedy block" which made no sense to me and was not much help at all but after thinking about it for a little while it came to me like a flash of light in my gray matter which was followed by an intense headache and some numbness in my left arm, "comedy block" is a major problem for humor writers and the lack of motivation and ideas can be used for motivation, makes sense? No thought so.

There are a few things that you can do to help improve your motivation in all things not just writing so try these if you find yourself lacking brain power!

Getting drunk, simple and affective but can work better if an orgy follows the consumption of various liquors. liquor in the front poker in the rear!

Getting stoned, although I hate stoner's and believe they are all tree hugging hippies that have nothing good to offer anyone ever, the lighting of a "blunt" can on occasion be helpful in the search for mystical creatures and lulz. Warning, remember that everything is funny on weed so never post what you've written while stoned until you've read it straight!

Actually the only way to force motivation and ideas to flow is threw mind bending drugs and alcohol so just get wasted and remember these things can also cause brain malfunctions so try not to do it more then twice a day except for orgy's, they can be done and SHOULD be done as many times a day as possible and all photos should be forwarded to me!


AngieSS September 24, 2008 at 1:49 AM  

LMAO Thank you for this informative post on what to do in case of "comedy block". I had tried everything, but alcohol, drugs, and orgies. Now I see what needs to be done next time.

p.s. Photos from first orgy will be sent asap -- any subsequent ones will need to be purchased upfront!

~Static~ September 24, 2008 at 3:27 AM  

@Damo - Ahhh, you are coming unto your own my son. I am very proud of you. Your grammar, punctuation and spelling has improved ten-fold. Continue down that road and it's only a matter of time that you will be listed among the ranks of ULTIMATE LULZERBLOGGERZ.

Also I wanted to remind that you forgot some of my points about comedy block (similar to writer's block - this is a multiple choice test so have your thinking caps and pencils ready)

To Rid Oneself Of Comedy Block You Must;

a.) stuff the tail end of a live fish in your butt, as the fish tries to escape let him flop his head against your buttocks then dance around until inspiration hits you like a ton of bricks or until the sudden realization hits you that your neighbors/friends/family are watching you.

b.) write all your s's as z's instead! Americanz do it. Why zhouldn't YOU?!

c.) gargle with a 50/25/25 mixture of antifreeze, gasoline and nitroglycerine - see if any inspiration explodes within your tiny fragile little mind.

d.) write about your limp and pathetic humor deficit for all to see and evaluate. Don't whine about it - simplify it - poke fun at it. Post that you need comedic viagra, anthropomorphiZe your comedy block, make your comedy block a story about a monster that you must destroy before he poops on you which is funny in and of itself!

More on the subject can be found HERE
(seeings as you also forgot to incl the backlink =|)

It appears that you had a combination of all the above covered Damo. Good Job! You get an "E" for effort and a shiny new pair of clown shoes - you'll earn that clowning degree in no time.

@angiess - m0Ar OrGeeeZ!

dani c September 24, 2008 at 6:54 AM  

Hey...where's you get that picture of me from?

dani c September 24, 2008 at 6:55 AM  

It's a shame that I let my beard grow that long...

Jeffman September 24, 2008 at 7:25 AM  

Liking the new look, Damo. And I agree one hundred percent with the getting drunk cure.

I tend to shun sobriety full-time nowadays.

As for Static, the man is unhinged, and you can't buy advice like that.

Damian (666) September 24, 2008 at 12:03 PM  

@ Yall, thanks! I try and orgy's really do help! I have put those ideas into practice and its awesome!

@Static Yeah bro cheers on the spelling! I couldn't find your comedy block post on Krapsody although I must admit I didn't look that hard, I always get stuck reading everything else on Krapsody for hours and hours and run outta time!

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