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How To Steal An American Election

Wednesday, September 17, 2008

Things each candidate must know in order to become president of the United States

1.) Obama's new strategy is simple. Get breast implants.

Obama tells America exactly what's on his mind.

2.) I think it's an obvious choice for McCain to become a black female in order to win the most votes.

McCain shows America exactly what's on his mind.

3.) Finally, get rid of your running mates. Biden and Palin are a couple of twits.

And now a message from our sponsors...

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Why You Should Vote Republican

Stay tuned for more krap©


kathcom September 18, 2008 at 4:40 AM  

Dude, the pic of Obama with tits almost made me puke.
If you did a picture of McCain on top of Helen Mirren's crinkly cleavage, it would probably put my head in the bowl.
You'd better not be promoting the itch cream while I'm spreading penile acne as the winner of your Hell Award for Evilness.
As any woman can tell you, a spotty penis adds friction. Throw in a little pus and you've got a hot night of loving, my friend.

~Static~ September 18, 2008 at 11:47 AM  

@Kathcom - Truth be told, Obama puked when he saw himself like that. BUT I think McCain found it kinda hot.

Don't worry, the itch cream is only a promotional bonus that goes along with the Angry Clown Award.

As any woman could tell you my endowments are gratuitous and likened to a cucumber. Oh so bumpy for the rough rider... in you.

You may keep the pus...

Damian (666) September 18, 2008 at 6:01 PM  

Finally American politics hit the Angry Clown I was waiting for it and I'm glad I did, Obama's boobs not real? I feel ashamed for something anyway great post Static you always now how to make me super randy and laugh at the same time! Your fully choice bro.

~Static~ September 19, 2008 at 1:14 PM  

Why thank you. There's better pus where that came from. Must.. find.. best... pus pocket.. evar...

Kelly September 20, 2008 at 7:29 PM  

It's best to keep a tube of pus around in the bedroom. Especially, the lumpy green kind. Also... Covering your genitals with squirmy maggots can tell that special someone you're really into them.

Chat Blanc September 21, 2008 at 3:24 AM  

loving the changes in the candidates. angry clown cream, scary! ;)

~Static~ September 24, 2008 at 3:40 AM  

@Kelly - Brilliant idea! Why I just found a used syringe in a dumpster to extract pus (the lumpy green kind) from a festering boil on my arse and put it in a hemorrhoidal cream tube (talk about recycling). I now have a new product to market...Angry Clown Repellent! Finally an END to annoyances, grabbing and Butt Rapists once they get a look at the pus filled boils on your rear!

@chatblanc - If you thought the post was scary just read my comment above! =D

Lydia September 24, 2008 at 5:34 AM  

God, the Obama picture is hilarious.

RBV September 25, 2008 at 11:38 AM  

I'm always drunk when I blog. Wait...I think I might just always be drunk.

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