Be cool

Dildos and Dildonts

Monday, March 19, 2012




This is a dong

There's a few things I've learnt in my 3 weeks as being a proprietor of fine rubber, silicone and jellies and if your ever lucky enough to work at a honorable establishment like an adult store then there's a few things you should know. So I present to you a list of what you should NOT do when selling rubber dick to the sick!

THE ANGRY CLOWN WHAT NOT TO DO WHEN WORKING IN A SEX SHOP LIST

  • Never ever EVER ask a customer if they need a hand. For obvious reasons.
  • Never ask a customer how big their anus or vagina is EVEN if it helps you work out if they need a 12inch or a 14!
  • Never offer to show the customer how a product works especially when explaining anal beads, I learnt this the very hard way.
  • Never assume you know what the customer wants. 80 yr old grannies sometimes want double ended dongs, sad but true.
  • Never greet a customer by asking wassuuupppppp, you wont like the answer.
  • Never run around the shop naked with a 14 incher chasing customers, no matter how much fun it is.
  • Most peoples fetishes are fucked up so try not to laugh when a customer wants a blow up turkey doll that has a 7 inch cock.
THE MOST IMPORTANT THING IS.......
Forget the rules and fuck as much shit up as you can!

This is also a Dong

8 comments:

Interesting Facts March 23, 2012 at 12:07 PM  

You have presented a perfect list of what we should NOT do when selling rubber dick to the sick!

Hannah Denski March 23, 2012 at 5:46 PM  

:D noted! I mean, you never know...

Kelly April 25, 2012 at 9:55 AM  

Are you sure it's not okay to chase customers around with rubber dicks about the shop? I thought that was the standard game in sex toy shops. If you catch up to them, you just whack them in the back of the head and say, "Okay... now you're it!"

Angry_Clown April 25, 2012 at 10:34 AM  

True Kelly but I prefer playing that game with my natural talents so to speak, its more fun when it's green and spits at the customers!

Kelly April 25, 2012 at 11:39 AM  

lol... sick.

Static April 25, 2012 at 12:34 PM  

Holy crap. It's back. Angry Clown is back!

I have never worked at a sex shop before, but I would have to agree with that advice for the most part. The only things I tend to disagree with are:

"Never ask a customer how big their anus or vagina is EVEN if it helps you work out if they need a 12inch or a 14!"

Chances are if they're visiting a sex shop, then they're ALREADY in the market for the biggest most expensive fucking dildo you've got. Make sure it's colossal! Like freakin' space shuttle sized. They've probably had them all so don't hesitate to bring out "the special". That's what I'd do.


"Never assume you know what the customer wants. 80 yr old grannies sometimes want double ended dongs, sad but true."


This is a PERFECT example of what I was talking about. Refer to my response above. 80-year old grannies want "the special"...'cause chances are an 80-year old granny has been around. She needs a new sensation now, brah (colossal sized!)

Ryan Boyles January 7, 2013 at 8:25 AM  

Lol for rule number two: “Never ask a customer how big their anus or vagina is EVEN if it helps you work out if they need a 12inch or a 14!”. Why is it prohibited to be done?

-Ryan| sex toys Philippines

Emma Watson April 25, 2017 at 1:50 AM  

A good dildo is like a good book: long, thick, and hard to put down! We have dildos in all shapes and sizes, for vaginal and anal use. dildos

You've just read

You've just read
Sucker

Subscribe via interwebmail

Enter your email address:

Delivered by FeedBurner

  © Blogger template Writer's Blog by Ourblogtemplates.com 2008

Back to TOP