Angry Clown Hate Mail

Since I've been a guest contributor for Angry Clown, I receive a few hate mails on occasion. They usually end up berating me for making fun of everything under the sun, which includes of all things...clowns.

Never mind my vicious attacks on overweight-bearded women that smell of limburger cheese, ass-raping politicians that don't lube ya up before doing the deed, and taint-sucking telemarketers that call you repeatedly at 3 am. Okay, they're fucking clowns too, but different from any regular run-of-the-mill clown.

Glad we got that cleared up.

This is but one example that I have received about my contribution to the site (or certain aspects of it). I don't even think it warrants a response, but I guess this ass clown was determined to get SOMETHING out of me... so instead of an email reply I will instead mock him in front of an audience for the uberlulz. Personally, I think this guy is a complete whacko. I'll let you come to your own conclusions.

Dearest most-est wonderful Static:


My name is Pogo the Clown. While searching the internet for links to clowning-related pages, I was confronted with the GODDAMN Angry Clown page, and to say the least, I was extremely offended by your writings... fucko. Now WAIT--before you go off and take this as a complete complaint, I want you to know that I KNOW you have (1) the right to expression, and (2) the right, frankly, to not like clowns. But literally thousands of children DO like clowns, and search for the word "Clowns" every day.


Truth be told: it's hurting my business (which includes birthday parties, mitzvahs, and Strip-O-Grams), and and I'm running out of children, especially boys, to "entertain". While you do have the right to expression, you do not have the right to slanderize the entire clowning industry, nor any particular "clown" therein.


I might agree with you on some of the things on your page--but that picture of the clown tied up on the train tracks? I think that is an extremely poor use of judgement on your part. I would have complained about that myself much sooner if I knew.


Any way, what you are doing is EXTREMELY detrimental to the art of clowning. Thus, I would ask you to please remove all detrimental and/or destructive graphics and materials from your page. I don't think we have to elaborate on what is opinion and what is destructive--good common sense tells us both that.


I have contacted Google on the content of your page, Yahoo! about the link to your site, as well as the companies from which you have received your awards, as well as the WGN Broadcasting company concerning your graphics. Please do not take this personally; but the content of your writing and the Angry Clown web pages are more than just an opinion--it is a complete display of hatred toward the art of clowning.


If you wish to contact me, you may do so at JWGacy@gmailz.com.
Thank you in advance for your understanding and cooperation.


John Wayne Gacy
Pogo Enterprises


p.s. if you are ever in the Chicago area, feel free to stop by my house. Just let yourself into the basement, grab a ghb laced beer and make yourself at home.

 Gee, that was stirring. John included this rather interesting photo of himself. This image might look quite innocent, but the person under the clown make-up and Pogo persona, is none other than John Wayne Gacy. It's true. He was not really executed. It was all faked. Don't you know by now that bureaucracy makes sharpening a pencil a monumental and expensive task? It was far cheaper and easier to let him go, and then relocate him several times.

To know that this 'man' raped and murdered at least 33 young men and was a known clown is enough to make my skin crawl. No, not every clown is a murderous, sick human. But if anybody out there is wondering where my opinions of the man come from, take a look and just try to imagine... being subjected to extreme sodomy, getting murdered, and then buried in a crawl space next to dozens of other rotting corpses, by an Angry Clown like Pogo.


So, as the master of ready wit and stunning repartee, my response to you John, (a.k.a. Pogo) is simply...
Fuck off you red-nosed buggering bastard.


For more excrement and half-witted commentary visit: Krapsody

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Deep and disturbing

In a strange mood at the moment almost like there is impending doom just around the corner so thought I might do a post about how the world might end...cool. Well I'm just going to type any crap that comes out of my Zoloft soaked brain, thats my excuse.


It all started on a day like today the call came threw and within hours it was on every channel in the world the streets were empty and the no one could believe what they were seeing. The news reports said it was the end, dooms day because the comet was going to hit earth and there was nothing anyone could do not even superman or Buffy, I know not even Buffy can you believe it?

Anyways the reports said the earth had 1 hour of life left so everyone should be with there families and everyone they love, every prisoner no matter what they had done were released and all armies sent home. Everyone knew this was it and there was no point fighting it so there was a freaky calm that almost made it seem like the earth had already died and no one was left.

A short time later the TV went dead and all the radio stations followed except for a few stations with presenters that had nowhere else to be. The massive rock was first sighted near Japan and was only a innocent looking dot that seemed like it couldn't even squash a fly.

There was only 30 minutes to go before the end all that could be heard was babies and kids crying and the occasional roar from the engine of a stolen Ferrari or Porsche being driven down the street. I headed into my bedroom and sat on my bed not knowing if it would hurt or not hoping that it wouldn't I didn't think it would because it was going to be quick unless it wasn't a direct hit then I would die slowly and painfully with the millions of other people that were unlucky enough to not be in the "strike zone".

I couldn't handle it anymore I had to end it now the waiting was the worst and I didn't want to go like this I wanted to finish it myself and not have some dumb rock choose how and when, I grabbed a knife from the kitchen sink and walked towards the bathroom I wasn't crying just sad as I entered the bathroom and ran my last bath I would ever have. I slid slowly into the water and clutched the knife with my left hand at first and with one long and hard strike I cut deep into my right wrist, It didn't hurt as much as i thought it would it kinda tickled. After doing the other wrist I felt like I was slowly loosing myself but I wasn't afraid, not of death not know.

My eyes were slowly getting heavier and I knew I had beaten the rock I sure showed it that it couldn't kill me, it would never get me not now not ever, as I faded that thought kept running threw my mind, it was all over.

An hour had passed and still no rock had hit, the TVs and radio stations came back on and started reporting that the rock had missed and the earth would live to see another day but it was to late for me, my life ended that day it was the end of my world.

Ok thats great I'm a nut.

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